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Sam Dyson DFA by the Rangers

I must admit, I thought that the way Jays fans so exceptionally thoroughly jeered Rangers reliever Sam Dyson last season, when he made his first appearance of the season at Rogers Centre since being turned into a living joke by José Bautista’s epic bat flip home run, was a little bit over the top. Poor piss-stained Sam simply happened to be unwitting victim of Bautista’s greatness! We didn’t have to hate him, did we? This was, after all, before the Odor punch and before the Rangers truly showed their piss-soaked colours.

On the other hand, not long after Bautista crossed the plate, Dyson did drag his full diaper from the mound up to the plate to dumbly confront Edwin Encarnacion for gesturing to the crowd, mistakenly believing that the Jays’ slugger was pumping fans up, instead of what he was actually doing: imploring them to stop throwing shit onto the field.

So, with that in mind… whatever! Hate away!

And in that spirit, BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Just a year after coming to town as a garbage team’s suddenly almost-dominant reliever that the Jays had let get away — “best stuff in the system,” John Farrell once said about him — Dyson has been designated for assignment by the Rangers.

I mean… I don’t want to celebrate anybody losing his job too much, and I do still kind of think that we’ve probably had enough fun at Dyson’s expense to last all of our lifetimes. But he’ll land on his feet and figure it out, I’m sure — I’d honestly be pretty OK if the Jays really did claim him; worst case Ontario he gets to be very uncomfortable with his new teammates for a while, then just gets D’d FA again… everybody wins! — and the Rangers are pure trash, so this is pretty fucking funny.

Plus, obviously, it’s an outstanding excuse to watch the bat flip again — and… shit… to watch the whole bottom of the seventh inning of Game Five again. We’ll be showing this one to our grandchildren. Thanks, Sam!