Hell yes, the Trash Birds are here to make the Jays look less bad

The Jays are riding a four-game losing streak after getting absolutely spanked by the Yankees in New York over the weekend. Thankfully for us, the idiot, unsuccessful cousin of the American League East is showing up right on time to make us feel better about ourselves.

The O’s, who have already been mathematically eliminated from playoff contention, are in town for a three-game set starting on Monday. The Jays have manhandled the Orioles — I mean, who hasn’t? They’ve won like 30 games all season — all year, giving us some nice, albeit brief, releases from reality. Toronto owns a 9-1 record against the 2016 AL Wild Card Game Runner-ups this year, and, if all goes according to plan, they’ll be 12-1 come Wednesday night.

Advertisement - Continue Reading Below

If not for the Orioles, the Jays would be 46-68 on the season. They’ve helped us to excellent moments like Aaron Sanchez’s seven innings of no-hit pitching, three separate walk-offs, and Chris Davis spazzing out after he struck out for the millionth time.

What to expect from Baltimore this week? Well, since trading Manny Machado, they’ve gone 8-18, which, somehow, is actually better than the pace they were operating at when he was on the team. Beyond Machado, they’ve also dealt Zach Britton, Kevin Gausman, and Jonathan Schoop. No one on the team has an OPS over .750, they’re letting guys like Craig Gentry and Jace Peterson get on the field every day now, and their best starter ERA is 4.71.

It’s stuff like that that helps make you forget that Josh Donaldson is about to be traded for a potato, Aaron Sanchez’s career has been completely derailed by a blister, and Kendrys Morales is the closest memory this team has to the 2015 ALCS but for all the wrong reasons.