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Today is a good day to remember that the Texas Rangers have never won the World Series

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Cam Lewis
5 years ago
Two years ago today the Texas Rangers experienced their greatest moment in franchise history. Rougned Odor punched Jose Bautista in the face, giving Rangers fans something incredibly important and exciting to rally around because, of course, the team they cheer for has never won the World Series.
The Punch was nothing more than a little bit of angst being expressed by the Rangers towards their father, Jose Bautista. As you’ll remember, Bautista became full-time owner of the Texas Rangers franchise, all of its players, and the entire fanbase back in October 2015 after he did this:

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Since then, the Texas Rangers, by rule, have to purchase Jose Bautista a gift for Father’s Day.
The Rangers won the first two games of the 2015 American League Division series to the Blue Jays in Toronto and then proceeded to head back to Texas to shit themselves in a completely idiot-proof situation.
But, remember, this is the Rangers! This is the team that, in case you forgot, has never won a World Series for a reason. Back in 2011 they blew every single lead imaginable in Game 6 of the World Series. They blew a two-run lead in the bottom of the ninth, they blew another one in the bottom of the tenth, and then they finally blew the game in the bottom of the 11th.
Anyways, Texas did the thing they know how to do best in the 2015 ALDS — lose. The Jays stormed back and kicked the shit out of the Rangers in Texas in back-to-back games to force a decisive Game 5 in Toronto. After taking the lead in the top of the seventh, the Rangers made a whole bunch of errors, setting the stage for Jose Bautista to fulfill his destiny as Greatest Toronto Blue Jay Position Player of all time. He took the 1-1 from Dyson, rocketed it into space, chucked his bat, made the roof blow up, and made every single player, staff member, and fan of the Texas Rangers collectively wet themselves at the same time.
Absolutely legendary. It’s important that we take a moment out of our day to remember that we, as Blue Jays fans, not only have two World Series championships to remember, but we also have exciting moments like this. Since we don’t bathe ourselves in sewage, we don’t have to rally around a guy punching another guy in response to getting completely owned in the playoffs the previous year.
We could even re-live this moment in which the Rangers, perfectly presented with an opportunity to get back at the Jays in the 2016 ALDS, managed to get owned even harder the second time around.

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While the Rangers may not have a World Series banner to hang anywhere in Arlington, they can continue to jerk off to The Punch while proudly flying this participation award up in the rafters.
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