The wind has picked up on this Friday afternoon. Spring’s arrival is maybe not so imminent as we thought. Bitter cold is on its way.

Sounds like a perfect situation for us to warm up with some goddamn hot fire tweets, and here comes Kevin Pillar to the rescue!

First, though, meet Bill. He’s, according to his Twitter bio, the editor of the sports section of the Cambridge Times — as in Cambridge, Ontario, outside of Kitchener-Waterloo. He is also, according to the giant picture of Red Sox championship rings he uses as his background photo, a Red Sox fan.

Hey, man. Whatever. That’s cool. You be you.

What Bill is certainly not is a Kevin Pillar fan. Or maybe he likes Kevin just fine, in the overall, but there is one aspect of Pillar’s game that Bill definitely doesn’t like: his dives. And he’s not afraid to say it, either!

Let’s watch what happens…

Note: Bill sometimes doesn’t get sarcasm. Perhaps I should have mentioned that earlier.

Aaaaand the payoff…

ZANG! SNORT! OOF! KA-BLAMMO! Roasted!

Hey, so I guess this one was one of the other 50%, eh Bill?

Let’s maybe leave the Zaun-esque takes where they belong: at Hemingways.