The loss of that broom beard is potentially more upsetting than the Evil Empire trading for Giancarlo Stanton.

According to the Yankees PR Twitter account, the Yankees have signed future former-beard haver and ex-Blue Jay Adam Lind to a minor-league deal. He now has the opportunity to be a Blue Jays and Yankees legend like Vernon Wells and Lyle Overbay.

We loved Lind for pretty much two reasons: the beard and his ability to crush right handed pitching. Lind got a minor league deal despite pretty much coming as advertised; a very attractive platoon option. Over the past three seasons, Lind hit .276/.345/.488 with a wRC+ of 120 in 1105 PA against right-handed pitching.

Of course, we know about the dumb rule that the Yankees have forbidding players to rock facial hair. If you thought a regular Yankees jersey was ugly, wait till you see a baby-faced Adam Lind in one.

Nothing in sports is guaranteed, but Lind will have to compete with… Greg Bird for at-bats against rightys. Factor in the short porch in right field at Yankee Stadium, and…fuck. The Yankees are already frustratingly good and this gives them yet another option who can mash without any risk associated with a big contract.

It was nice cheering for you, Adam.